When thinking through their estate plan and how they want their assets (money and property) managed after they pass away, most parents wish to treat their children equally, often out of a sense of fairness. However, sometimes being fair or doing what is right by your children may mean giving unequal inheritances.
The Key Takeaways
- Treating children fairly does not always mean equal inheritances.
- How and when each child receives an inheritance may need to be customized to each child’s needs and circumstances.
- Not providing an outright inheritance is usually a good choice, as assets in a trust can be protected from the beneficiary’s irresponsible spending, divorce, predators, and creditors.
When Unequal Inheritances May Be Fair
- choose to leave more money to your son who struggles to support his family on a modest teacher’s salary than to your daughter who makes seven figures, is married to a Wall Street tycoon, and has no children;
- opt to give a larger inheritance to a child who has dedicated themselves to volunteer work, the arts, religion, or public service;
- want to compensate a child who has given up part of their own life to care for you;
- wish to provide equally for all of your grandchildren, even if one child has more children than another;
- have a much younger child who needs care until adulthood, whereas your adult children are financially independent;
- have a special needs child who will need expensive and in-depth care for their entire lifetime; or
- have a child who has contributed to the family business and other children who have not. Instead of making them all equal owners in the business, you may want to leave the business to the one who has contributed and shown an interest and then provide for the others with other assets such as life insurance.
Distribution of Inheritances May Also Vary
What You Should Know
Many parents do not provide outright inheritances, preferring to keep assets in a trust for their children. The trustee can make distributions for your children’s benefit based on guidelines you provide, while assets that stay in the trust have greater protection from irresponsible spending; creditors (bankruptcy, lawsuits, and divorce); and predators (those with undue influence on your child).
Actions to Consider
- If you can afford it, consider giving your children some of their inheritance now. Not only will you have the opportunity to witness them enjoying your gift, but it will also provide insight into how your children will manage an inheritance.
- Consider whether your children should be your only beneficiaries. Perhaps you have additional goals such as providing for your grandchildren’s education, gifting property to other loved ones, providing for beloved pets, making charitable contributions, or setting up a family foundation or donor-advised fund.